Mulla Nasrudin Story Collection 2

Mulla and his Father

One night, Mulla Nasrudin’s father noticed a light in his barn. He went to see what it was all about and he found Nasrudin with a lantern, all dressed up. “What are you doing all dressed up and with that lantern?” asked his father. “I am going to call on my girlfriend, Dad,” said Nasrudin. “I have got to go through the woods and it is dark.” “When I was your age calling on my wife for the first time,” said the father, “I went through the woods without a lantern.” “I KNOW,” said Nasrudin, “BUT LOOK WHAT YOU GOT, DAD!” 

Mulla’s Wit

“Darling,” said the young woman,”I could die for your sake.” “YOU ARE ALWAYS PROMISING THAT,” said Mulla Nasrudin, “BUT YOU NEVER DO IT.” 

Mulla and God

Mulla Nasrudin, who was really unaccustomed to public speaking, arose in confusion after dinner and muttered hesitatingly: “M-m-my f-f-friends, when I came here tonight only God and myself knew what I was about to say to you AND NOW ONLY GOD KNOWS!” 

The Bride

After the bride’s first dinner, she asked her husband, Mulla Nasrudin, “Now, dear, what will I get if I cook a dinner like that for you everyday?” “MY LIFE INSURANCE,” said Nasrudin.

Returned from Honeymoon

Mulla Nasrudin’s young wife, recently returned from her honeymoon, was complaining to her friend about her husband’s drinking habits. “If you knew he drank, why did you marry him?” her friend asked. “I DID NOT KNOW HE DRANK,” said Nasrudin’s wife, “UNTIL ONE NIGHT HE CAME HOME SOBER.” 

Mulla’s First-aid

Mulla Nasrudin, who had just passed his test for his first-aid certificate, was on his way home. Suddenly, he saw a man lying face down in the street. Without a second thought, he threw himself upon the man and began applying artificial respiration. After a while, the man raised his head and said, “SIR, I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO DO, BUT I AM TRYING TO FISH A WIRE DOWN THIS MANHOLE.” 

Mulla’s Drunken Words

Mulla Nasrudin was drunk and at a football game was making such a nuisance of himself that the people around him threatened to call the police if he didn’t sit down and shut up. At that he shouted, “show me a policeman, and I will show you a dope.” The words were no sooner spoken when a big six-foot policeman arrived on the scene and said: “I am a policeman.” “WONDERFUL!” said Nasrudin. “I AM A DOPE!” 

Mulla’s Blind Wit

The lady contributed to Mulla Nasrudin on crutches, but could not resist the temptation to preach to him. “It must be terrible to be lame,” she said, “but think how much worse it is to be blind.” “That’s right, Lady,” said the Mulla. “WHEN I WAS BLIND, PEOPLE KEPT PASSING COUNTERFEIT MONEY OFF ON ME.” 

Young Father

The young father was pushing the crying baby down the street with what appeared to be absolute calm and self-assurance. People on the street could hear what he was saying as he passed. “Take it easy, Nasrudin,” he said. “Don’t let it get you down, Nasrudin, you will soon be safe back home. Things will be all right, Nasrudin, if you just keep calm.” One motherly type woman waiting for a bus, heard and saw the young father and said to him, “I think you are wonderful the way you are taking care of the baby.” Then she leaned over to the baby and said, “Now, don’t cry, Nasrudin, everything is going to be all right.” “LADY,” said the father, “YOU HAVE GOT IT ALL WRONG. HIS NAME IS TOMMY — I AM NASRUDIN.” 

Mulla in Dance Hall

“I don’t guess I have anything to complain about,” said the mussed up young man, Mulla Nasrudin, as he listened to another mussed up young man describe his ejection from a dance hall. “They treated me all right.” “What do you mean, treated you all right,” said the other young man. “They threw you out, didn’t they?” “Yes,” said Nasrudin, “They threw me out the back door, but when I told the bouncer that my family was in the social register, he picked me up gently, brushed me off, and escorted me back into the dance hall. THEN HE THREW ME OUT THE FRONT DOOR.”